Dissolution

I know goodbye is hard to say
I know because it’s also hard to hear
I’m not demanding guarantees
Or fifty-one apologies
To see you crying on your knees
But if you don’t intend to stay
Perhaps a word or two to make it clear

I know farewell’s a heavy phrase
I know because I’ve had to say it too
It’s like a glove that’s thistle filled
A piece of hope we know we killed
The ending bleak that we revealed
I’d never wish it on your days
But if it must be said, then say it true

I know that leaving leaves a mark
I know because I wear enough for two
It’s like a wish we ribbon cut
A door of woe that’s hard to shut
Like why is in a war with what
So leave me not within the dark
Or hide behind, “It’s me, it isn’t you…”

I know departure numbs the soul
I know because my own feels like it’s led
I don’t expect a letter penned
That tries to promise “Still a friend”
But whispers softly “It’s the end”
So, if the bell you mean to toll
I beg you, put my hopeful heart to bed

Closing

What do I do when answers that I give are not received?
And when the truths I try to give, are seen as lies to disbelieve
What shall I do to make you see?
That what you’re seeing isn’t me
I’m tired of this battle with the version some perceive
And I’m just tired of defending words that mean not to deceive
What shall I do to make it clear?
When no one ever wants to hear
I know the whos and whats and whys since, clearly, I conceive
The very words I choose to write, but then, in that, there’s no reprieve
Why does this always have to be
A game of “there’s a hidden key”?
When all I try to do is find a set of words to weave
And try to turn them into fireflies in this, a world of eves
Can I not have that bit of cheer?
Must every sunrise disappear?
What shall I do when, patience, I have no more left to thieve?
I simply offer you a “Fine, you win…” and say, “I guess it’s time for me to leave…”