A little more, a little less
Your smile sly, and silver pressed
As much as I, with such duress,
Would give in word or touch or breath
This final moment clutched abreast
Those bitter wars and brittle tests
That never were enough to wrest

From you a healing glow
A hint of sun beyond the clouds to show
Where shadows weep and grow
And still compared to this
The loss of bliss
Is hell so relegated, to be still the weaker foe

For never less, and ever more
Your smile soft, forever sure
As much as I, who thus adores
And always has, the touch of yours
As water runs to clutch the shore
My letters sent, but never pure
So better meant, but never swore

Though surely, now you know
Your heart a gift, and so your words, a bow
And days without are low
When they’re compared to this
Enduring bliss
And heaven feels like second place compared to anywhere with you I go


I See You

Pandora is a complicated thing. I’ve had it throw bands at me that makes me wonder if there’s not some malicious intent at work behind the scenes, some line of code in their algorithm that’s commented as:

// Let’s just fuck with ’em and play something that’s completely out there.

But recently it threw this song at me, and it’s nothing like what’s on my playlist (e.g., Katatonia, Opeth, A Perfect Circle, Puscifer, Acrania, Beyond Creation, Rivers of Nihil, and Pink Floyd are some of the most consistent bands that appear…) and I was like, “huh…well…color me several shades of surprised…I rather like this…”

So I figured I’d share it…because they say sharing is caring. And I’m rarely either. So it stands to reason that I should occasionally be both.

Image result for straight face emoji

Anywho…here it is…



Light was dancing with you
As a flower in a forest safe from time
Holos and reflections of the dream I still pursue
Forever deaf to the objections
That I seek an end that never would be mine

Shadows seem to tell me –
As they coalesce and gather to reveal
The tilted recollections of the world I wish to see –
That I invented new connections
Out of fantasies that never would be real

I was walking by you
Like a river in a desert running dry
Dunes of dead affection met the death of morning dew
Leaving maps of old directions
To a citadel of never in the sky

Light was there and growing
Like a blossom that tomorrow had in store
Bound for resurrection without any way of knowing
It was your impure perfection
That had led me where I’d never been before


Circle back to heaven on your wings of air and soar
To places I recall, for you and I were there before
Resting like a eulogy of hope that dared adore
As if an intersection where the sea and sun could share the shore

Drift into the wind as if a feather meant to fly
To consolations crafted like a letter sent reply
Held forever hovering as “whether” went to “why”
As exclamations made of you then punctuated the intent of I

Fall beyond the precipice that held your view to here
To places that are beautiful and skies are blue and clear
Made into the symphony I heard in lieu of fear
As if your words were an Elysium you granted me when you were near

Pull me through the shadows and the absent barren view
To valleys and to vistas long ago, for there we knew
The sky was never large enough to keep you where you flew
And all the same, I didn’t care as long as when you landed I was there with you


When desolation spans from here to there
And land that we remember lush is nothing short of bare
And scales are always tilted but we label them as fair
So do we lose the will to care
For every bandage that we place, we see another wound to spare

And though we crane our neck and try to hear
The words another offers saying darkness disappears
If spend, we did, much less of life obsessed with little mirrors
But soon we lose the will to cheer
With fingers pointing at the pain and the misfortune and the fear

For desolation spans whe’er we look
And hands we all imagine hide a knife or else a hook
And everything we lost, we feel another surely took
For life is never like a book
When we decide there are no good intentions, only crimes and crooks

But still I try to listen, and recall
That good does not exist in terms of purely none or all
That people try and people fail, and all of us can fall
And bandages might be a stall
But then if no one’s standing up, how long until we’re all resigned to merely crawl?


When was it last that sun had shone
Upon this heart of stone
Where now it rests in the caress
Of not a home
But in the chest of one unknown?

I often think, but can’t recall
The moment – not at all
For though it swells, and though I dwell
There is a wall
But not a trail or guiding hall

And still, I look for hints of lights
A lantern in the night
Or firefly to flicker by
To offer sight
Or just a sign of some respite

But fireflies have all but fled
And left me here to tread
But was it done for reasons none
Or was I led
To realize, that I could choose to be a sun for you instead?


With fingers resting numb
Upon the passages of time removed
And eyes that even now succumb
To all the things I never proved
I wait

Upon the palisades
Where all valleys seem an empty veldt
And words became a palace made
Of definitions never felt
A fate

That rested on a pin
As if an angel caught in tired flight
Was beckoning me back again
With but a glance, so very slight
A gate

Secured, or so I feared,
I pressed it lightly and it opened wide
And shadows, they were swiftly sheared
But were my efforts thus applied
Too late?

With presage, I advance
For I have had enough desert sand
And thus, I roll the dice of chance
Extend to you my open hand
And wait